I wanna bring you to show and tell
meet me or not, i'm out of control
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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