I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
