Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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