i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
