oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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