who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize