I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize