just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I supernannyed him into submission
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
