Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
