How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Terrible idea I love it
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
