***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
