Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
