remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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