fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
