I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
