I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Barsexuality is the new black.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
