Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
