So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize