you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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