honey bunches of taint.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
