remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
