I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
