i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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