marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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