i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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