she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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