dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Randomize
