it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
