Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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