I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
