I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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