I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I deserve this hangover.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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