I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
