Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
