In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
