Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
