There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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