You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
