I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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