hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
try to milk me bitch
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