Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize