why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
My vagina is very pro this idea
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