is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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