it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize