hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Randomize
