Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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