eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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