69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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