Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
