Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
