HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
