Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
