he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize