Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
